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New England Patriots Column

By: Paul M. Banks

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5/1/08

Solid if not Scintillating
 
The New England Patriots were not flashy, but they were effective on draft weekend, going right after their needs. After last year’s draft day heist of Randy Moss, you knew that the ’08 event was going to be much less exciting than the ’07 edition. It would be very hard for Scott Pioli and company to do something as amazing as trading a fourth-rounder for a man who had the greatest statistical season in history at his position right? They did make a trade though, trading down with the New Orleans Saints, swapping their #7 for NOLA’s #10 in exchange for the Saints’ third round pick and a third rounder next year.
 
 
 
Linebackers Need Apply
 
1st round #10, Jerrod Mayo, ILB, Tennessee
“He is a pretty versatile player, did a lot of things down at Tennessee. Played inside, played outside played in sub defense, played in the kicking game,” Belichick explained shortly after the pick. So, where will Mayo fit into the Patriots’ 3-4 defensive scheme?
Linebacker was the primary concern heading into this draft as Junior Seau likely won’t be back for a 19th season and Roosevelt Colvin was cut. The Pats added Victor Hobson away from At 6’1” 245, Mayo has size and with a 4.55 forty, he brings speed to the table too. He is athletic and most likely to have an impact as any defender on the draft board. Most important is that versatility Belichick spoke of; which will get him on the field early and often. Being multifaceted is a trait highly coveted to the “Patriot Way.” Starting linebacker Adalius Thomas is perhaps the most versatile defender in the game today and he will serve as a good mentor for Mayo. This will be key when the injury bug bites again in the front seven.
 
 
3rd round #78, Shawn Crable, LB, Michigan
The Patriots rarely draft for need; most years they don’t have to, but they added some badly needed linebacker depth for their 3-4 system in the third round. The linebackers that are healthy and still remain are all on the wrong side of 30 and not getting any younger. Highlights from Crable’s profile on patriots.com “With Crable's tall and rangy frame, some talent evaluators feel that he could bulk up for a possible switch to the defensive line, where his pass rushing and pass coverage skills could excel as a hybrid linebacker/defensive end. Evident by his 28.5 tackles behind the line of scrimmage as a senior, the Wolverine has proven to be among the elite blitzers in the 2008 NFL Draft pool.”
 
6th round #197, Bo Ruud, LB, Nebraska
“He has volunteered with local hospital visits, American Education Week and the Lincoln Midget football league.” Patriots.com Don’t know if he’ll make the team, but anyone who gives his time to work with midgets is a-ok in my book!
 
 
Cornering the Market
 
This off-season has also seen the departure of Asante Samuel, Randall Gay and Eugene Wilson. Given that he went to the University of Illinois, the Wilson departure truly hurts me quite a bit. Here’s what the Pats did on draft day to rebuild their depleted secondary
 
2nd round #78, Terrence Wheatley, CB, Colorado
“One of the fastest players in college, Wheatley's sudden burst and running stride has also brought him success as a kickoff returner. His 1,350 yards on kickoff returns rank second on the school's all-time record list and his 919 yards on those returns in 2007 set a school record.” Patriots.com
 
4th round #129 Jonathan, Wilhite, CB, Auburn
According to his Patriots website scouting report: “In 34 games at Auburn, Wilhite started 23 contests. He registered 101 tackles (77 solos) with a 9-yard sack and a quarterback pressure. He recovered and caused one fumble, adding fourteen pass deflections and three interceptions. Wouldn’t it be great if Rodney Harrison helped mentor this kid into the kind of DB that racks up both sacks and interceptions like Harrison does? Hopefully, he won’t play with the same type of “roid rage” that Harrison does though!
 
The Patriots really don’t have any “needs” on offense, so everyone they added this weekend was essentially a “value” selection. If these players do make the team, they are not likely to contribute much.
3rd round #94 Kevin O’Connell, QB, San Diego State
5th round #153 Matthew Slater, WR, UCLA
 
 
You Only Tape Twice
 
It’s pretty rare for a 16-0 team to have a top ten draft pick. Oh wait, there’s never been a 16-0 team until this year, so it’s really rare! The Pats had the 49ers pick and that’s why they had such a high first round draft pick. They also didn’t have their own due to that whole “Spygate” thing. The draft was big news this week, but the even bigger news was the announcement that former employee Matt “secret agent man” Walsh has struck a deal with the NFL and a d-day has now been set. The Maui golf pro and his lawyer now have an arrangement on the league that on May 13th, we’ll see just what he has to bring to the table. He may have evidence that the Pats taped the Rams walk-through the night before the 2002 Super Bowl. Or that may just be a rumor. Either way, you know we’ll get a little more information on this espionage story, and you know that I’ll have a lot to say about these 007 style “Patriot Acts” next month.

 

3/28/08

Requesting Reinforcements: It’s no secret where the Patriots are going to go on draft day, the back eight on defense.
 
With the draft just about a month away time to reflect on 2007’s Draft.
 
 First Round: (21st) Brandon “Hollaman” Meriweather, S, Miami
Only draft pick to make an impact, he could start in Samuel’s place, now that Asante bolted. Had 27 tackles, 18 solo. He didn’t contribute all that much on the field, but at least he has his amateur rap career as “Hollaman” to help keep him busy. You can hear his x-rated rhymes with the “7th Floor crew” here. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2IPqjgS0Of8
 
 
Fourth Round (127th): Kareem Brown, DT,  Miami
Did not make team
 
Fifth Round (136th): Clint Oldenburg, OT, Colorado State
Did not make team
 
Sixth Round: 
(180th) Justin Rogers, OLB, Southern Methodist
Did not make team
(the copy and paste function on my laptop is getting quite a workout here!)
 
(202nd) Mike Richardson, CB, Notre Dame
Made team, but never registered any statistics in a single game box score. So he affected the team about as much as salads and rice cakes impact his former coach Charlie Weiss’s grocery list.
 
(207st) Justice Hairston, RB, Central Connecticut
 Who? You know you’re inconsequential when even a Pats geek like me has never even heard of you!
 
(208th)  Corey Hilliard, OT, Oklahoma St .
Who is this guy? Did he even play in the preseason? Like Hairston, he failed to make the team. What a broke draft so far!
 
Seventh Round
(211th): Oscar Lua, ILB, USC 
The former Trojan turned heads last year, and maybe would’ve made the team if not for a leg injury that put him on IR.  He was released a couple weeks ago, so let’s pour out a little liquor for the Oscar Lua era!
 
(247th):  Mike Elgin, G/C, Iowa
See Brown through Hilliard above. I doubt that even Mike Elgin has heard of Mike Elgin!
 
 
On opening day, the secondary will look very different from what it was in 07. The now departed Randall Gay was the nickel back who produced 38 tackles and a fumble recovery in the 07 season. The first time I remember seeing the now departed Eugene Wilson make a play on the gridiron, I was a senior in college and the football beat writer for the student daily at the University of Illinois. Wilson was a freshman at the time and he housed a punt 60 yards in a non-conference blowout of Arkansas St. “Geno” went on to have a great collegiate and pro career in the eight years since then. However, the last couple of seasons have been rough for the injury-plagued 5’9” DB. Maybe things will be better for him in Tampa.
 
And of course, star CB Asante Samuel is now gone to Philadelphia and truly replacing him is the off-season’s number one priority. Ellis Hobbs started at the opposite corner position with Randall Gay (now with New Orleans) serving as the main backup. Hobbs’ solid season was overshadowed by Samuel. Ellis set a new career high for pass breakups and finished seventh on the team in tackles. With Samuel moving on, he must step up as the team’s most reliable corner. The Pats responded to all these losses by signing cornerbacks Lewis Sanders, Fernando Bryant and S Tank Williams.
 
There was also a significant loss in the linebacking corps. Rosey Colvin, the only high priced free agent the Pats have signed in recent years (before last year’s bonanza of course), finished third on the team in sacks and second in fumble recoveries. Impressive when you consider how me missed pretty much the whole second half of the season due to injury. The loss of him and $5.5 million salary was necessary given the fact he failed a team physical.
 
 
Over The Hill:  (Players who will need to be replaced soon)
 
- Rodney Harrison
- Junior Seau
 -Linebacking corps: every player has been in the league almost 10 years 
 
 
On the NFL Draft Blitz mock draft, USC linebacker Keith Rivers is currently listed as the Pats pick. With this analysis:
 
The Patriots run a hybrid 3-4 that enables them to use players to their maximum potential.  Rivers is not a perfect fit as a 3-4 Inside Linebacker, but he will make plays and replace Tedy Bruschi in a year.  
 
Here are some other potential first round picks you should know about:
 
Mike Jenkins
Ryan Clady
Aqib Talib
Leodis McKelvin
 
 
Hey Pats fans, you can email feedback to me at paulbanks05@yahoo.com

 

2/14/08

Do I really have to do this? Reflect on how the season ended while the painful wound is still very fresh? Last week, I was in my “I’ll gather/display strength in the darkest hour moment,” in regards to the Super Bowl. This week is “kiss my white a$$, you jealous and petty Patriot hating bastards,” mood. Everything I have to say to people who thought the Super Bowl was glorious) could best be expressed by my pal Fitzy in this video. He echoes my sentiments exactly…in slightly coarser language.
 
The Patriots had the greatest regular season in history. Period. They became so great and powerful in 2007 that they were despised by most of America because of it. However, becoming upset by an underdog that never should have been there in the first place ruined everything. Only 16-0 team ever…check. Most points scored in a season…check. AFC Title…check. Super Bowl ring?...there’s work left to do here. Luckily, the Pats have the 49ers draft pick this season. So the first 16-0 team will have the #7 overall draft pick to replenish their arsenal for ’08. Here’s what I see as the team’s main weaknesses:
 
1. Defense between the 20s
2. Run Defense
3. Cornerback (Asante Samuel probably will be departing)
4. Linebacker depth
 
Among the many free agents that could interest the team, I think these are the ones that the Pats will be after the most: Marcus Trufant, Drayton Florence, Mike Doss, Lance Briggs, Boss Bailey, and Danny Clark. The Pats peaked WAY too early, throttling Buffalo 56-10 in midseason, but blowing out no one else but the Steelers the rest of the way. I know that sounds weird to say, winning but NOT blowing anyone out. Perhaps we all became too spoiled this season; how would like to be an Arizona Cardinals or Buffalo Bills fan? Whining about winning by just 7 instead of by 27 is not often an option for them. So we should maintain a sense of perspective; no victories are promised to us. To quote Bernie Mac at the beginning of Kanye West’s second album, “you think this is easy, this promised to you, well ain’t nothing promised to you, look at me do I look like I have promise face?” In the Super Bowl, the Patriots encountered the worst combination of bad luck and bad breaks possible, not to mention a New York Giants team that had the most improbable and impossible playoff run in NFL history. Brady was clearly not 100% physically in the Bowl, and likely not himself in the AFC Title game either. Also, how on Earth did this unit self-destruct so badly to yield 5 sacks to New York in the Super Bowl? To quote Daniel Powter, “cause you had a bad day.”
 
The adversity of the late minute collapse tested the resolve of Patriots fans all over the world. I was in mourning for some time. I got in a better mood by purchasing a Eugene Wilson jersey a couple days after the loss. He’s the only link between the two teams I’ve covered regularly in my young writing career. (I was the football beat reporter for the student daily at the University of Illinois while he was there.) With a couple upgrades in the right places this off-season, title number four is a very real possibility. Certainly not a forgone conclusion though. We just learned the hard way what happens when you start planning victory parties and celebratory books about seasons. Will we recover and win it all next year? In the words of Barack Obama, “Yes We Can!”
 
Hey Pats fans, you can email feedback to me at paulbanks05@yahoo.com

 

1/30/08

60 Minutes till Immortality: 18-0 and one to go
 
Like Miami Sharks head coach Tony D-Amato (Al Pacino’s character in Oliver Stone’s film Any Given Sunday) told his team during his inspirational speech “I don’t know what to say really. 30 minutes to the biggest game of your professional lives…” We all know how big Sunday is, nothing more really needs to be said. We’ve endured two weeks of media hype running the same storylines into the ground and forcing meaningless ones down our throat.  So I’m not going to talk to you about Brady’s boot, or Kevin Faulk being the X factor, or Laurence Mauroney’s rushing yards increase in the second half or Tom Coughlin’s defensive game plan to make the Patriots one-dimensional. No, I’m going to give you a fresh column with information and ideas. You’ve all heard so many of the same things over and over gain this week because this is the biggest stage there is; and it’s even bigger this year because history is on the line.
 
This quote from Doug Haller’s column in the The Arizona Republic states my point perfectly: "(The Super Bowl) is the single biggest shared common experience in American society," said Mark Dyreson, an associate professor of kinesiology and history at Penn State. "For better or worse, you can't get much bigger than that. The Super Bowl does better than Christmas, the Fourth of July, any singular event."
 
 
Critic’s Corner
 
How did the Chicago Tribune sports columnist Mike Downey get his job? The Patriots-Chargers game inspired him to write GOD AWFUL columns that make him look either retarded, spineless or both. He tried to convince us that the Chargers would pull off a huge upset by listing the names of cheerleaders that he saw on the San Diego Charger Girls website. I can’t believe this guy has actually WON journalism awards, because almost of the columns are…well, maybe his work is a reason why that crazy OSU coach Mike Gundy screamed at his notorious press conference “That’s why I don’t read newspapers, cuz they’re GARBAGE!” First, Downey proudly proclaims that the Chargers will win (without listing a single salient reason why by the way) in his Sunday column. Then the next day he tries to cover his butt, by writing a column full of sorry excuses. Given the rare event he writes something that makes sense, he still sounds like an old, creepy, out-of-touch old man trying to sound hip.
 
-On the other side of the spectrum, juxtapose the crapola above to this succinct and insightful piece “Yes, Belichick really is a Genius” from William C. Rhoden of the New York Times. Rhoden does an excellent job articulating the perspective of the game today versus when Paul Brown and Vince Lombardi roamed the sidelines. The column tells us in both an efficient and entertaining manner why Belichick’s special gifts and cerebral approach grant him a special place in the elite coaching pantheon. Talent wise, comparing Rhoden to Downey is like (let’s use a wide receiver analogy here) 2007 Randy Moss versus 2006 Bam Childress.
 
-For something totally off-the-wall, check out my version of The Departed starring the 2007 New England Patriots http://www.thesportsbank.net/patsdeparted
“Shipping Up to Boston…whoa..ohhhh” 
 
-We all love Tom Brady’s MVP season, and he is probably ‘America’s Golden Boy’ right now as the USA’s starting quarterback, but take a minute to think about how ridiculous it is for him to be harassed by paparazzi all the time? No seriously, just ponder how absurd it is for someone to be pursued by stalkerish photographers who fill a market consumed by losers with too much time on their hands. A picture is worth a thousand words, so check out this video of Brady from tmz.com
 
-I’m sure you’ll agree that too many people in our nation need to get a life. Leave him alone! Just let him do his thing.
 
-In winning his fourth AFC title, Tom Brady became the fastest to gain 100 wins as a QB, getting there in 16 fewer starts than Joe Montana and 29 fewer than Brett Favre:
Tom Brady 100-26-0
Joe Montana 100-42-0
Ken Stabler 100-49-1
Johnny Unitas 100-50-3
Bart Starr 100-50-5
Brett Favre 100-55-0
 
 
-One of the most famous Patriots fans on the internet, BradyFan83 is back with two parody music videos that are certain to appeal to Patriots Nation. The first “Mr. Tomlinson” highlights LTD’s losses in the postseason.
The second is BF83’s video apology to Randy Moss
 
 
Prediction Time:
 
Patriots vs. Giants II: This time it's personal! Forgive the cheesy action-movie tagline, because the first meeting was actually personal too. (Well, sort of) In early 2006, a former New York Giants secretary, Sharon Shenocca named Bill Belichick as "the other man" in her brutally bitter divorce proceedings. So
 maybe it's time to run up the score with some "F@# You Touchdowns" as ESPN’s ‘Sports Guy’ would say. There haven't been many Pats blowouts lately, but they also haven't played in a warm/indoor climate in awhile. Arizona will have pleasant conditions, a faster track, and a quicker pace to the game; BIG advantage to New England. You’ve heard about that “fierce Giants pass rush that’s supposed to destroy Brady?” That would be the SAME unit that didn’t sack him until there was just nine minutes left during the week 17 game. And that occurred ONLY because of a missed assignment by the Pats What about Tom Brady's walking boot? My answer is to simply cite the most oft-quoted line of Sun Tzu's The Art of War. "All warfare is based on deception." It will be yet another example of Bill Belichick’s genius. Expect his game plan from this blowout to join his Super Bowl XXV and XXXV masterpieces which are already in Canton. Patriots 49, Giants 27
 
Hey Pats fans, you can email feedback to me at paulbanks05@yahoo.com
By the way, in the Patriots trivia application on Facebook, I have a score ranking #545 out of 279,876 total participants

 

1/23/08

Why Patriots Haters have no Case!
 
The 2007 New England Patriots are one win away from becoming the greatest team in NFL history, perhaps the greatest team in American sports history. So why are they so despised? You’d think people would just enjoy watching the path to perfection, but the hatred and bitterness is awfully strong among American football fans right now. And it carries over to the field; just ask numerous whining members of the vanquished San Diego Chargers. So I must quickly say, “Hey San Diego, thanks for Coming!” Which reminds me that I forgot to say, “Hey Colts, thanks for coming!” last week.
 
 
Here are the Charges being brought against the Patriots by the rest of the football loving universe:
 
Charge #1: Head Coach Bill Belichick is an evil cheat.
 
The verdict: GUILTY, but sentence has already been served. He’s paid a debt and its time to move on. I’m going to take two famous sound bites from the steroid era of baseball: Mark McGwire’s “I’m not here to talk about the past” and Barry Bonds’ “this record is not tainted.” Although both obviously had something to hide, such is not the case in Foxboro, Massachusetts. 18-0 is not tainted and Pats haters need to move on. They took a half-million bucks from BB and his first round draft pick. Hasn’t he been punished enough?
 
Charge #2: QB Tom Brady is a philandering playboy, a condescending pretty boy player with tons of baby mama drama.
 
The Verdict: NOT GUILTY ON ALL CHARGES. It’s always funny to me how the same women who claim to be relationship experts are always the ones who end up whining about being “screwed over” by the man who won’t commit to them. Hey, you picked him. If you want sympathy, go vent with your Avril Lavigne and Alanis Morrissette lyrics. You may get compassion from Dr. Phil, Oprah, and the rest of the dating-industrial complex, but you’ll get none here. If you’re Tom Brady, all women want you and all men want to be you. So both Gisele and Bridget know whom they’re dealing with. They knew what they were getting into. 
 
Bottom line, you have to get it done in your job no matter what goes on in your personal life, because your boss won’t accept that as an excuse. What if Gisele showed up to Gillette Stadium last Sunday? Would everyone blame Brady’s uncharacteristic three interceptions on her presence? You know there’s absolutely no way that the grey hoody would let that fly.
 
Charge #3: The coach is an uncharismatic, arrogant, aloof, condescending, mean, grouchy, evil, home-wrecking monster.
 
The Verdict: NO CONTEST Michael Jordan is regarded as the best basketball player alive. He’s also regarded to be a horrible human being. Everyone I know who has met him describes him as (at best) a soulless corporation disguised as a human being or (at worst) names that I cannot type here. None of that has a smidgeon of influence on his hardwood achievements. If you want to hate Belichick, that’s fine; but don’t hate him as a coach because you think you hate him as a person. His lack of public relations skills and/or inability to manage his image persona has absolutely no effect on his brilliant ability to coach.    
 
Charge #4: Their star wide receiver Randy Moss is a magnet for legal trouble.
 
The Verdict: CASE DISMISSED Moss may have a deeply checkered past, but since his Oakland days, he’s been a model citizen. The battery case with a Florida woman sounds more like a very bad breakup than it does a felony.
 
Charge #5: They bludgeoned their opponents to death this season by running up the score long after the game was decided.
 
The Verdict: NOT GUILTY Someone has to hold the record for most points scored in an NFL season, right? Why not the ‘07 Pats? If you don’t like having your throat stepped on as you lay on the ground…then stop your opponent from knocking you down in the first place. Were some of those extra touchdowns scored this year unnecessary? Sure, but obtaining points is the point of the game. So do you still hate this team? Hopefully, your hate is just based on the irrationality of pure emotion. Because I’ve just shown that your hatred can’t be based on logic and reason!
 
By the way, when you get the chance, check out my Jan 18th Red Eye guest panel appearance in my Bill Belichick sweater; the Red Eye is a daily publication of the Chicago Tribune, geared towards 18-34 year olds.
 
Hey Pats fans, you can email feedback to me at paulbanks05@yahoo.com
By the way, in the Patriots trivia application on Facebook, I finished all the questions with a final score ranking #716 out of 264,257 total participants.

 

1/16/08

AFC Title Bout: Patriots enter healthy and fresh, Chargers enter banged up
 
This game certainly has a boxing ring to it. As I watched the other two remaining AFC teams slug it out and acquire new injuries, I thought, “man whoever the Pats get will really be missing a lot of key guys.” Oh, was that sweet to see Peyton Manning go home early. Do I like the Colts? Yes, about as much as I like mosquito bites, cold sores, and CO2 pollution. The Colts got eliminated by Billy Volek, Darren Sproles, and a one-footed Antonio Gates. As Borat would say “very nice. I like.” Thanks, San Diego. However, the party’s over now! {Unless the Pats secondary completely collapses}
 
 
Nuggets and tidbits from Divisional Weekend
 
 
-What did I say in my column last weekend?
 
“The playoffs are when Bill Belichick breaks out the brilliant and unexpected tactics that no one sees coming. Remember the first round win over the Jets last season with that bizarre swinging gate type of formation near the goal line? The direct snap to the setback”
 
You all saw the fake the overly high snap/direct snap play inside the 5 resulting in a Ben Watson touchdown. Look for something like this again when the Pats get inside the ten. Why do so many people hate Belichick? Can’t they just appreciate his genius like we do?
 
-Critical Condition: Jaguars rookie safety makes dumb remark in response to Tom Brady’s record setting night
 
What’s with all the trash talk this season from Bush-Leaguers? We had that annoying Mercury Morris from ’72 Dolphins and Anthony Smith guaranteeing a win. Now this:
Jaguars rookie safety Reggie Nelson. "He ain't all that … He's all right," Nelson said. “It was a check down game," Nelson said, suggesting that most of Brady's completions were short and easy to complete. "Anybody can go 26-of-28 in a dump-down game."
Reggie, then what does that make you? You are certainly less than all right then. Brady set an NFL RECORD by completing 92.9 percent of his passes: 26 for 28 for 262 yards and three touchdowns. One of his incompletions was a drop by the usually sure-handed Wes Welker. You said anyone can do it…then how come no one else in NFL history had, before Saturday night?
 
-Tom Dimitroff was hired as general manager of the Atlanta Falcons on Sunday, leaving his job as director of scouting for the unbeaten New England Patriots. Dimitroff, who has been with the Patriots since 2002, will direct the Falcons' football operations, including working with a new head coach on draft decisions, free agency, trades and other personnel decisions. He’s moving on up like “the Jeffersons.”
-Head coaches are known for trademark clothing garments. Les Miles: white baseball hat, Tom Landry: Fedora hat, Steve Spurrier: visor and of course, Bill Belichick: sleeveless grey hooded sweatshirt. We can now add Jack Del Rio and his very original Jaguars leather jacket to the list.
 
 
Going where no one else has been: 18-0!!!
 
The Chargers are peaking at the right time, having won 8 in a row. Should we be worried? Maybe. Probably not. Because San Diego is a great match-up for the Patriots.
There’s a reason they lost 38-14 in week two in a game that New England took very easy during the last 20-25 minutes. The Chargers won’t be able to pressure Brady enough and the Pats have too many weapons on offense. It’s not likely that Moss will be held to one catch for 14 yards again. Even if he is, Welker, Watson, Faulk, Maroney, Gaffney, Stallworth etc. will all pick up the slack.
 
Ladanian “on the Pats, if you ain’t cheatin’ you ain’t tryin” Tomlinson and Phillip Rivers should play. And a one footed Antonio Gates likely will too. But will they be 100%? No. Will they be 75-80%? Will that be enough to pull off an upset? Billy Volek and Michael Turner are serviceable back-ups, but not big-time playmakers. Darren Sproles is a decent return man, but he’s not as huge a threat receiving or running as he’s been portrayed lately. He has four all-purpose touchdowns this season, three of which came against the colts, two in one quarter. Some may call him an X-factor. I call him a guy who’s averaged 20 yards from scrimmage a game for a reason.
 
How can San Diego win this game? By going to medical school? Maybe Shawn Merriman can pass those steroids around the locker room and help his team heal quicker. New England has looked vulnerable against the pass lately, but part of that is due to 1.) They’ve shut down the run a lot better the last couple of games 2.) Most teams are usually trailing the Patriots, and they need to pass to catch up in a limited amount of time. San Diego will certainly be helped if pigs get cleared for takeoff at Boston Logan airport and/or Satan finds the temperature in his home community dropping below 32 degrees Fahrenheit. But hey, anything can happen. That’s why they play the games. Any given Sunday…cliché…cliché…etc.
 
 
De-Ja Blue
 
The Pats conference title game is starting to remind me of my hometown Chicago Bears playoff run last year: a one seed getting a tougher match-up and challenge in the divisional round, not the title game. Both the Bears and Pats played “America’s Team” in the conference final game. Both the Chargers and Saints became media darlings after a historically devastating natural disaster displaced citizens of their cities. Many took refuge in their home stadiums. Because of climate change terrorizing their fan base and the underdog status of both teams, most people in America rooted/are rooting for the Saints and Chargers. I expect a similar result this time: the home team in dark blue jerseys will pull away in the second half and snow will fall in the 4th quarter as a sort of natural celebratory confetti!    
 
The pick: Patriots 44 Chargers 23. Hey San Diego, thanks for coming!
 
Hey Pats fans, you can email feedback to me at paulbanks05@yahoo.com
By the way, in the Patriots trivia application on Facebook, I now rank #846 of 255,633

 

1/10/08

AFC Divisional Playoff Preview: Jacksonville at New England
 
 
“Jaguar is Performance,” How the Jags could spring the Upset
 
-Like Black Jack, keep it under 21
The worst thing that could happen to Jacksonville is for them to get caught in a shootout. You know the basketball phrase “just trading baskets?” they need to do the complete opposite by dominating time of possession and playing lights out defense.
 
 -Born to Run
Jaguar automobile company prides itself on their products’ ability to run forever; run well and run smoothly. Kind of like the Jaguar football team. The Jaguars will get their top tier running game going and their MoJo working. Fred Taylor will also get his carries and yards against New England’s 26th ranked run defense. Of course, the Patriots are second in the NFL in scoring defense, so these Jags will find stop signs and road blocks once they drive into the red zone. If they can maneuver into the end zone during each drive deep into Patriots territory, it will be a tight race to the end.
 
 -Bradykiller
The Jaguars will have to harass Brady, get in his facemask, get some sacks, and force a lot of hurried throws. Jeremy Mincey, Bobby McCray, and company will need to have the game of their lives to get this tall order accomplished. The Patriots will be going after the rookie safety out of Florida, Reggie Nelson, in their passing game. If he doesn’t grow up in a hurry, it’s up to fellow youngster OLB Justin Durant and veteran safety Sammy Knight to compensate. Overall, Jacksonville would likely need to win the turnover battle by a very big margin to take this game.
 
 
Why Jacksonville WON’T pull off the upset
 
-Doomed to repeat History
The Patriots have won nine consecutive home playoff games dating back to Dec. 31, 1978. I was just 10 months old the last time the Patriots lost a home playoff game. New England's nine consecutive home playoff victories are tied for the second longest streak in NFL history. The Patriots will play in their 22nd playoff game since Robert Kraft purchased the team in 1994, the highest number in the entire league over that time. During their 12-year history, the Jaguars have never won in New England.
 
-Under Center of Attention
Brady holds the NFL record for most consecutive wins in the post season at 10 and has an overall postseason record of 12-2. He also has a regular season career record of 98-26. David Garrard is making his second career postseason start and looked squeamish at times last Saturday night. If Garrard falls behind early, he may not be able to get himself back up. If Brady falls behind late…see film of the New York Giants and Baltimore Ravens comeback victories.
 
Also, Peter Christian, a friend and colleague of mine, got into an email debate with the ONE guy who voted for Brett Favre instead of Brady for MVP. He points out to Frank Cooney, owner of The Sports Xchange.com, why Brady should have been unanimous! http://www.thesportsbank.net/bradyretort.html
 
 
-Weather or not
A lot of people thought cold, stormy, and wintry weather would favor the Jaguars. Unfortunately, for Patriot haters, the forecast calls for temperatures in the 40s and partly cloudy at game time. We all know the weather reports are anything but certain, but it doesn’t look like a blizzard is coming to save Jacksonville. This is a pretty lousy theory anyway. Why should “Patriots Weather” favor the Florida team?
 
 -Genius at Work
Jacksonville’s game plan is to run the ball and try to keep New England’s Imperial offense off the field. Well, the Pats can win with a run-oriented, grind-it-out approach too. See week 15 versus the New York Jets. The playoffs are when Bill Belichick breaks out the brilliant and unexpected tactics that no one sees coming. Remember the first round win over the Jets last season with that bizarre swinging gate type of formation near the goal line? The direct snap to the setback which caught the “Mangenius” in green and white with his pants down? It's like Belichick baiting Kyle Boller and Jay Feeley in successive weeks during the regular season, his coverage schemes gave the Ravens and Eagles passing games a false sense of security with success on the short and intermediate routes. BB knew both QBs would get greedy, go deep, and the Pats secondary was waiting to pick both of them off and end their upset chances.
 
 I like to think I understand what Belichick was doing there because I’ve studied his work (32 Years in the NFL, 13-3 postseason record) so intensely. Plus we have similar educational backgrounds with credentials from fine academic institutions; he has an economics degree and I have an MBA. So we both look at football in a business-like manner stressing “market-place efficiency.” One of my friends sent me an email today saying: (likely sarcastically)
 
“….Unless you did it that way for a reason (you are the Belichick-like genius).”
 
Well, maybe when it comes to Patriots trivia. If you’re on Facebook, join the Patriots fan application and take the trivia challenge. My 8,240 total points rates me #1,708 out of 246,109. Which is a Will Hunting level “wicked smahht” score. However, until I reach #1, I’m not quite a ‘Belichickian’ genius.
 
When the playoffs began, I thought Pittsburgh would advance to this game…And they really should have. I think Jacksonville will be a much tougher test than the Steelers would have been. It will take the Patriots until the mid 4th to pull away and win.
 
The pick: Patriots 37, Jaguars 27
 
Hey Pats fans, you can email feedback to me at paulbanks05@yahoo.com
You’ll see many interesting New England Patriots themed photos and graphics in the comments box at myspace.com/paulmbanks 

 

1/2/08

16-0 PERFECT SEASON!!!  & My End of the Year Awards
 
By Paul M. Banks
 
It was an amazing and historical regular season in which no hyperbole can truly describe everything the New England Patriots accomplished. The first perfect season in a generation featured so many highlights, it was difficult to decide who deserved each award. Some people had to be left out. Sorry.


My 2007 end of the year awards:
 
The Outkast Award for “The way you move…do-do-do.” Offense- Randy Moss & Wes Welker
In a lot of games this season, Wes Welker was the de facto MVP. How many crucial third and long receptions did we see him make? Or how about all those bubble screens he grabbed at the line and turned upfield for huge plays. Watching the 5’9”
185 LB Welker dominate NFL defenders to the tune of 1175 yards and 8 scores with his sweet jukes and nifty moves was pure joy. The diminutive one shattered the Pats franchise record with 112 receptions tying Cincinnati’s T.J….I’m too tired to try spelling his last name correctly now.   
 
The way in which Randy Moss set a new NFL record for TDs was distinctive. Scoring grab #23 went right through his hands and we all gasped in disappointment. SO on the very next play Brady goes right back to him, right down the sideline and Moss burns the Giants for 65 yards and and the record; for both himself and Brady. Moss’
98 catches ranked third in the NFL. His 1493 yards led the entire league
 
The Outkast Award for “The way you move…do-do-do.” Defense- Adalius Thomas
It’s amazing to see a man that big move with the speed, agility, and quickness of linebacker adalius Thomas. Or maybe it’s unique to see someone that fast and nimble be that large. Either way, Thomas was a big reason why the Patriots defense finished second in the league in points allowed.
 
The Outkast Award for “The way you move…do-do-do.” Special Teams- Ellis Hobbs
With all the Spygate coverage and offensive records being set, we almost forgot about his NFL record tying 108 kickoff return against the New York Jets in week one.


Offensive MVP –The entire offensive line unit
Yes, I know Tom Brady will likely win the league MVP for his record setting numbers and Randy Moss will probably finish second, but I’m going to defy convention and give this award to all the starters (three of which are going to Hawaii) and reserves who gave him the necessary protection to make all this happen. What makes this unit even more psychologically dominating is the fact that they don’t employ a lot of ‘Max Protect’ schemes (I’ve met Max Protect in person by the way, he’s a really cool and nice guy) because the Pats bread and butter offensive set is a three-wide. Unlike last year when we saw mostly ‘double tight’ sets.


Defensive MVP –Tedy Bruschi
A lot of people hate the Patriots and are jealous of their success. However, no one hates Bruschi. His life story is so heartwarming and inspiring that no one can espouse vitriol on #54. He is the heart and soul of this defense. The 12 year veteran led the team in tackles by a wide margin.
 
Newcomer of the year- Randy Moss

To quote Outkast again “glitter glisten floss floss I catch a beat runnin’ like Randy Moss”

Stat of the year
49 straight when winning the turnover margin.
+313 scoring differential.
NFL record for points scored, its just too difficult to decide.
 
Play of the year
Brady to Moss for 6, in the first quarter of the Giants game. Two individual records are tied and a team record falls; all on one play.
 
Play of the year runner up
 
-Brady to Moss for TD pass #50 and TD reception #23
 
-Brady laterals to Randy Moss, it hits the ground, Moss picks it up laterals back to Brady, who goes deep to Jabar Gaffney. The ball goes into end zone right over the head of the Steelers idiot rookie DB who previously guaranteed a victory.
 
Gaffney’s thoughts on the play:
"When I took off everyone bit up and I knew that if it made it back to Tom, it would be a touchdown. It took like forever for the ball to come down. I looked back and it was still in Tom's hand and I was like 'come on, let's throw it.'"

 
Story of the Year (for the People Magazine crowd)
Tom Brady, Bridget Moynahan, and supermodel Gisele Bundchen; the gossip pages were all over this team’s QB and his affairs. Brady once talked in an interview about how he had three older sisters and no brothers growing up. And how those sisters loved drilling him with questions about his personal life; I remember this because my immediate family is the exact same and I get the same business. Two big differences: his personal life is 1,000,000 times more exciting than mine and he has to deal with the entire nation (as well as his three older sisters) prying for details about his relationships.

Story of the Year (for the NSA wiretapping crowd)

Did you hear about this thing called Spygate? (not the sarcasm) A bunch of people pretty much called Belichick an evil cheating bastard. The Pats subsequently started winning games with scores like 52-7 and 56-10. The next stories were all essentially “Belichick is-an-evil-running-up-the-score-bastard.” What’s wrong with playing to win? By as much as you can?

 
Story of the year (All media outlets)
The perfect season; something we probably won’t see again in our lifetime.
Quote of the year (Accuracy division)
We're going to do the same thing. We try to win every week, believe it or not."
- Belichick, when asked if there was any extra motivation to beat the Jets in week 15.
Pure Belichickian press conferencism: horrendously boring and cliché!
Quote of the year (Humor division)
"We've played against a lot better safeties than him, I'll tell you that."
~ Patriots head coach Bill Belichick, when asked if the Patriots were targeting Steelers safety Anthony Smith
 
 
 
Postseason’s Greetings: #1 Seed. 5th straight AFC East title (8 of the last 11) 16-0!
 
PLAYOFFS!!! The three game season begins in two weeks, I’ll have a preview for you once we know who the first AFC victim will be. In the mean time, here’s some lyrics I wrote for a 2007 Patriots themed fight song:
 
 
Hey Pats fans, you can email feedback to me at paulbanks05@yahoo.com
myspace.com/paulmbanks 

 

12/26/07

Historical Offensive
 
The New England Patriots offense has set numerous records already, and more are within their grasp.
  
 
The New England Patriots have 15 wins in this regular season; tying a record set by numerous teams, but New England is the first to start out 15-0. We all know what happens next week with a win; let’s just hope the cable companies don’t shut us out from seeing history as the game is slated to be on NFL Network, NOT nationally broadcasted.
 
On Sunday, tailback Laurence Maroney had the best day of his young career, rushing for 156 yards on just 14 carries. This included a 51-yard run and a 56-yard sprint which was unlike anything I have ever seen. I’ve seen runs where the scoring player burned everybody and wouldn’t have been caught even if it were flag football, but this was different. There was no one else even on the screen during his 59-yard touchdown run. And it wasn’t just that no opposing defender was around him for most of his run. He beat every defender before he even got into the second level of the Miami defense. Usually, a back will have to accelerate to daylight through the line of scrimmage, shed a tackle or two within the front seven, then make a move or cut during his second level open-field burst. A big play like this usually concludes with outracing the safeties who dropped back to prevent such a big play. Maroney’s run only included the first part. He beat all eleven members of the Miami Dolphins defense just by surpassing the line of scrimmage. You could play John Madden video games for months and still not accomplish a touchdown run that looked like this. Yes, this Dolphins defense is terrible and the Pats offensive line is awe-inspiring, but this New England-catching-Miami-with-their-pants-down play is still rather unique. I’ve been watching football since I was four and covering the game in some capacity for multiple years yet I can’t recall a play like this. The only precedent comes from a fictional sports movie.   
 
In Dodgeball<